“The largest part of what we call 'personality' is determined by how we've opted to defend ourselves against anxiety and sadness”
— Alain de Botton
Simplified Meaning:
Our personality is shaped by the ways we deal with feeling worried or sad. Imagine a child who often felt scared in social situations. They might grow up to be very quiet and reserved, always avoiding large groups. On the other hand, another child might cope with anxiety by being extra friendly and talkative, winning people over to feel safe. These patterns stick with us as adults. So, the traits that make us who we are—like being shy or outgoing—often come from how we learned to handle tough emotions when we were younger. You can see this in how different people react to stress at work; some may shut down while others become more assertive. Understanding this can help you reflect on your own behaviors and maybe choose healthier ways to cope with stress and sadness.
