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"状況を評価し、受け入れられるために自分がなるべき人になることが適応するということです。"

Brene Brown
Brene Brown Researcher, Author, Public Speaker
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Quote meaning
The core idea here is all about adaptability and social acceptance. It's about looking at where you are and figuring out how to blend in—essentially, being a social chameleon. The concept is straightforward: if you want to be accepted by a group, you might need to adjust your behavior, language, or even appearance to align with that group’s norms or expectations.

Historically, this idea has been around forever. Think about high school for a minute. Everyone, at some point, tries to fit in with a specific crowd. Maybe it’s the jocks, the geeks, the art kids—each group has its own vibe, and if you want to be part of it, you’ve got to play the part. This isn’t just limited to teenage years though. In Ancient Rome, politicians and public figures often had to navigate complex social hierarchies, presenting themselves in ways they thought would gain favor and acceptance.

Let’s talk about a real-life example: Think of someone who’s just started a new job. On their first day, they’ll probably spend a lot of time observing their new colleagues. They might notice that the team is super formal, always wearing suits and addressing each other by last names. So, what do they do? They adjust their wardrobe and adopt a more formal tone in their emails and conversations. This helps them blend in and be accepted by their new coworkers.

So, how can you apply this wisdom in your life? Start by being observant. Pay attention to the social cues around you—the way people talk, dress, their interests. Once you understand the social landscape, make small adjustments to fit in. This doesn’t mean losing your identity or values, just tweaking your outward behavior to better mesh with the group. It’s all about balance.

Imagine this scenario: You’ve moved to a new city and you don’t know anyone. You decide to join a local book club to meet people. At your first meeting, you notice everyone is really into science fiction, but you’re more of a fantasy fan. Instead of diving into a passionate speech about why fantasy is superior, you might start by showing interest in their favorite sci-fi books, even reading a couple yourself. Over time, you gently introduce discussions about your favorite fantasy novels. This way, you’re not alienating yourself from the group, and you’re building connections.

Of course, the trick is to not lose yourself in the process. You’re blending in, not disappearing. It’s like seasoning food—just the right amount makes everything better, but too much can ruin the dish. So, next time you’re in a new situation, think about how you can adjust without completely changing who you are. It’s all about small, mindful changes that help you connect and feel accepted.

In the end, everyone wants to belong somewhere. And while it might seem a bit stressful to think about adjusting yourself to fit in, remember that it’s something we all do, consciously or not. It’s just part of being human. So, take a deep breath, look around, and figure out your best way to blend in without losing what makes you unique.
Related tags
Acceptance Adaptability Belonging Conformity Identity Self-assessment Social dynamics Societal pressure
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