"Nuestra autoconcepción en gran medida consiste en cómo vemos que los demás nos ven."

The main idea here is that our understanding of who we are is heavily influenced by how we think other people perceive us. Simply put, the way you think others see you shapes your own self-image.

Historically, this concept has roots in social psychology, particularly in the work of Charles Horton Cooley. In the early 20th century, Cooley introduced the idea of the "looking-glass self." He suggested that we form our self-concept by imagining how we appear to others and how they might judge that appearance. It's like holding up a mirror, but instead of seeing our reflection, we see the reflections of what we believe others think about us.

Imagine you're at a party, and you're worried about making a good impression. You catch a few people glancing at you and whispering. Depending on how you interpret those glances—whether you think they’re admiring your outfit or criticizing your dancing—you'll adjust how you see yourself. If you think they’re impressed, you may stand a bit taller, feeling confident. If you believe they’re mocking you, you might shrink into a corner, feeling self-conscious. This interpretation of others’ perceptions directly impacts how you feel about yourself.

Let's bring this idea into a practical example. Think about social media. Suppose you post a photo on Instagram. If it gets a lot of likes and positive comments, you might feel validated and attractive. But if it doesn’t get much attention or some negative feedback, you might start doubting your appearance or your popularity. Your self-conception shifts based on the feedback (or lack thereof) from others.

So, how can you use this insight to your advantage? Start by being mindful of whose opinions you’re prioritizing. Are they people you respect and who genuinely care about your well-being, or are they casual acquaintances whose opinions shouldn’t weigh so heavily? Surround yourself with positive influences—those who uplift and encourage you—not those who constantly criticize or belittle you.

And maybe, try flipping the script a bit. Instead of always worrying about how others see you, focus on how you see yourself. Think about your values, strengths, and achievements. Build a strong sense of self that doesn’t waver with every external opinion. It's like strengthening your internal mirror rather than relying solely on the looking-glass provided by others.

To illustrate this, let’s say you’re a high school student named Alex who loves painting. You put your heart into your artwork, but you're unsure if you're any good. One day, you overhear some classmates saying your paintings are amazing. You’re on cloud nine! You feel talented and proud. But the next week, a different group of kids laugh and call your work weird. Suddenly, you feel like a failure. Your self-conception is bouncing around based on these external comments.

Now, imagine you decide to focus on your passion and inner satisfaction rather than outside approval. You join an art club and find a mentor who appreciates your unique style and helps you grow. Your confidence builds because you value this constructive feedback. You still hear the occasional negative comment, but it doesn’t shatter your self-image anymore. You've strengthened your inner mirror, relying more on self-affirmation and trusted voices instead of the fickle opinions of others.

In essence, while it’s natural to care about how others see us, it’s crucial to develop a self-conception that’s resilient and not entirely dependent on external validation. Balance the reflections you get from others with a robust sense of self-worth and personal values. That way, even when the external mirror cracks, your inner reflection remains strong and clear.