"我尽量记住，当我听说朋友订婚时，这不仅仅是关于戒指和婚礼，结婚是一件严肃的事情，很容易被不重要的事物所冲昏头脑。"

Getting married is one of the biggest decisions you'll ever make. It's not about the flashy engagement ring or the dream wedding with all the bells and whistles. Those things are nice, sure, but they can distract you from what really matters. At its core, marriage is a serious, life-changing commitment. It's easy to lose sight of this when you're caught up in the romance and excitement.

Think back to the early 2000s, when reality TV shows about extravagant weddings were all the rage. Remember "Bridezillas"? People got so obsessed with the idea of the perfect wedding day that they sometimes forgot the whole point of the event—celebrating the union of two lives. Engagements and weddings were portrayed as fairy tales, with the 'happily ever after' implied but not guaranteed.

But here's the thing: those TV shows didn't show the real work that comes after the wedding day. They didn't show the couple learning to navigate life’s challenges together, or dealing with the day-to-day reality of sharing a life.

Imagine you're planning a wedding. You’ve got the Pinterest board, you've browsed through endless Instagram hashtags, and you've even started a spreadsheet for budgeting. It’s fun, right? Now picture this: You and your partner sit down to discuss finances or future plans, and suddenly, there’s a disagreement. Maybe it’s about where you’ll live, or how you’ll manage your finances. These are the sorts of conversations that give you a real glimpse into what your marriage will be like.

Now, let’s get personal. My friend Sarah got engaged a few years ago. She was swept up in planning the perfect wedding—choosing the venue, the dress, the flowers. But amidst all that, she and her fiancé began to drift apart. They rarely discussed their future together beyond the wedding day. It wasn’t until they had a serious heart-to-heart about their values, dreams, and expectations that they realized they had a lot of work to do to make their relationship strong enough to sustain a marriage.

If you're in this boat, here’s some advice: focus on the foundation of your relationship. Talk about the hard stuff—finances, career goals, family plans. Make sure you're on the same page. It’s not as Instagrammable as a sparkly ring or an elaborate wedding cake, but it's so much more important.

Picture this: you're at a coffee shop with your partner, talking about the future. You discuss where you’d want to live, whether you want kids, or how you'll handle conflicts. These conversations might not be as glamorous as wedding planning, but they’re crucial. They set the stage for a solid partnership.

Or think about a couple you know who’ve been together forever. What’s their secret? It’s probably not the size of their wedding or how much they spent on rings. It’s the work they’ve put into their relationship over the years. That’s the real stuff.

So, the next time you hear about someone getting engaged, remember: it’s not about the ring or the wedding. It’s about building a life together. That’s what’s truly worth celebrating.