"No todos los que peleas son tu enemigo y no todos los que te ayudan son tus amigos."

Sometimes, the people you think are against you aren't really your enemies, and those who seem to have your back might not actually be your friends. This idea is simple but incredibly profound. It challenges our knee-jerk reactions and asks us to look deeper at our relationships.

Historically, this kind of wisdom has been shared in various forms across cultures. It echoes sentiments from ancient philosophers and modern-day thinkers alike. They all warn us about the complexities of human relationships. There’s a reason why we see this theme pop up so often—it’s a lesson humanity keeps needing to relearn.

Think back to high school. Imagine you’re on the soccer team and there’s this one player who always seems to criticize you. You start thinking she’s out to get you. But then, in a crucial game, she passes you the ball in the perfect moment, leading to a winning goal. It turns out, she wasn't your enemy at all. Her criticisms were meant to push you to be better. On the other hand, there’s that one teammate who always sweet-talks and flatters you. But when push comes to shove, she doesn’t pass the ball, missing crucial plays. She likes you—sure—but she’s not really helping you.

So, how do you apply this in your life? Start by questioning your assumptions. Don't take things at face value. When someone criticizes you, ask yourself if there’s any truth to what they’re saying. Are they trying to help you improve? And when someone is always praising you, consider whether they’re doing it just to stay in your good books. It’s about being mindful and digging a little deeper.

Imagine this: You’re starting a new job. Your boss gives you a tough project right out of the gate. She’s demanding, asking for high standards. At first, you might think she’s setting you up to fail. But over time, you realize she’s pushing you because she sees potential in you. She wants you to succeed. Contrast this with a colleague who’s always inviting you for coffee breaks but never shares crucial information about the project. As nice as those coffee breaks are, they’re not helping you move forward in your career.

Think about a personal story. Years ago, I had a mentor who was relentless. He'd scrutinize every piece of work I did. It felt like he was always on my case. But, looking back, he was the one who truly cared about my growth. He wasn't my enemy; he was my greatest ally in disguise. Meanwhile, a coworker who showered me with praise never actually backed me up when I needed support. Those nice words were empty, and I had to learn that the hard way.

Life’s a bit like that. Not everything is black and white. People are complex, and their intentions are even more so. So, next time you feel like someone’s being hard on you, take a step back. They might be the ones who care the most. And when someone’s overly supportive, don’t just bask in the compliments—watch their actions. Actions, after all, speak louder than words.