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"You can't control your peers, but you can control who you play the game with"

Naval Ravikant
Naval Ravikant Entrepreneur
Translations
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Quote meaning
The heart of this quote is about realizing where your power lies. You can't change or control the actions of others, but you can choose who you associate with and who you spend your time around. It's about taking responsibility for your environment and your relationships, rather than trying to change people who may not want or need to change.

Let's consider some historical context to add depth. This kind of wisdom has been shared in various forms throughout history. Think about ancient proverbs or even advice from parents and mentors. They often boil down to the idea that you should focus on what you can control — your actions, your responses, your choices. It's timeless advice, applicable in almost every era.

Now, imagine you're working on a group project at school or a team assignment at work. There's always that one person who doesn't pull their weight, right? It can be beyond frustrating. You're stuck trying to pick up their slack or worrying about how their lack of effort will affect the outcome. But here's the thing: you can't make them change. What you can do is decide who you want to work with next time. Maybe you seek out more reliable teammates or communicate your expectations more clearly upfront. You take control of your choices, rather than banging your head against a wall trying to change someone else's behavior.

So, how do you apply this in real life? First, take stock of your current relationships and environments. Are there people who consistently bring you down or create unnecessary drama? It might be time to create some distance. This doesn't mean cutting people off harshly, but gently shifting your focus to those who uplift and support you. Start by setting boundaries and being clear about what you will and won't tolerate.

Here's a relatable story to drive the point home. Picture Sarah, a young woman who loves playing soccer. She's passionate and dedicated, but she finds herself on a team where a couple of players are always slacking off. They're late to practice, they don't take games seriously, and it's driving Sarah nuts. She tries talking to them, motivating them, even picking up their slack. But nothing changes.

One day, she meets another group of players who share her love for the game and her work ethic. They're organized, punctual, and enthusiastic. Sarah decides to join their team. The difference is night and day. She's happier, more productive, and the team's performance improves. She realizes she wasted so much energy trying to control the uncontrollable, when all she needed was a change in her environment.

The takeaway here is simple: focus on what you can control — your choices and your environment. Don't waste your energy trying to change others. Instead, choose wisely who you spend your time with and who you invest your efforts in. This way, you'll not only preserve your sanity but also create a more positive and supportive space for yourself to thrive.
Related tags
Boundaries Decision making Friendship Game Peer influence Personal choice Relationships Self-control Social dynamics Teamwork
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