"متوجه شده‌ام که نگرانی مانند دعا کردن برای چیزی است که نمی‌خواهید اتفاق بیافتد"

Worrying can often feel like a natural part of life, right? But what if I told you that worrying is like putting energy into things you don’t want? That’s the core idea here. When you worry, you’re essentially focusing on negative outcomes. You’re giving them power, almost like you’re hoping for them—although you’re not, obviously. It’s counterproductive.

Think about it. This was famously said by some smart folks to highlight how our thoughts can shape our experiences. It’s something that’s been around for a while, and it’s likely come up in conversations about mindfulness and positive thinking.

Let’s dive into a real-world example. Picture this: You’ve got a big presentation at work. You’re prepared, but you can’t stop worrying about messing up. You picture yourself stuttering, your mind going blank, and everyone looking disappointed. By focusing so much on these negative possibilities, you’re actually increasing your anxiety. And guess what? That anxiety makes it more likely that you might stumble over your words or blank out because you’re so stressed. It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Now, how can you apply this wisdom? Start noticing when you’re worrying. Catch yourself in the act. Ask yourself: Is this helping? More often than not, it’s not. Shift your focus. Instead of thinking about what could go wrong, imagine what could go right. Visualize yourself nailing that presentation, getting nods of approval, or even a round of applause. This isn’t just fluffy advice—it actually helps you create a more positive mindset.

Imagine you’re sitting with a friend, and they’re freaking out about a job interview. They’re saying, “I’m worried I’ll forget what to say, or I’ll get a question I don’t know the answer to.” You might remind them of this idea. You could say, “Look, worrying about it is like you’re asking for those things to happen. Why not focus on what you do know, and how well you can handle the stuff you don’t?”

This approach flips the script. It takes the energy you’d put into negative outcomes and redirects it to positive ones. It’s like reprogramming your brain. And hey, it’s not about pretending everything’s perfect. It’s about being realistic but choosing not to dwell on what you can’t control.

In another scenario, think about a student preparing for exams. They’re bogged down by thoughts like, “What if I fail? What if I can’t understand the questions?” Instead, they could change their focus to, “I’ve studied hard. I’m ready for this. I’m going to do my best.” This shift doesn’t eliminate the hard work—they still need to study—but it changes the mental game. They go into the exam room with confidence, not dread.

So next time you catch yourself spiraling into worry, pause. Think about what you’re really doing with that energy. You’re not just worrying. You’re, in a sense, hoping for things you don’t want. Flip it. Focus on what you do want. You might be surprised at how much it changes your outlook—and your outcomes.