"تحمل مسؤولية سعادتك الخاصة ولا تضعها أبدًا في أيدي الآخرين"

Happiness is an inside job. The idea here is straightforward: you are the master of your own joy. You should never rely on others to make you happy. Sure, people can contribute to your happiness, but the core of it should stem from within you. This belief places you in the driver’s seat of your own life, where you have control over how you feel regardless of external influences.

Historically, this concept has roots in various philosophies and religions. For instance, the Stoics of ancient Greece and Rome held that true happiness comes from within and is not dependent on external circumstances. They argued that we should focus on what we can control—our own thoughts and actions—rather than what we can’t, like other people’s behaviors. Think about it: if you hinge your happiness on others, you’re at their mercy. They might disappoint you, and then where does that leave you?

Let’s dive into a practical example. Imagine you’re at work, and you’ve been busting your chops on a project for weeks. You’re expecting some praise or at least acknowledgment from your boss. But the day rolls around, and... nothing. Zero recognition. If you rely on your boss’s accolades to feel good, you’d be pretty bummed out, right? But if you’ve cultivated the mindset that your efforts and self-worth are not dependent on external validation, you take joy in knowing you did a great job. You’re content because you know you’ve given it your all.

Now, how do you apply this wisdom? Start by recognizing your achievements without needing someone else’s affirmation. Create personal benchmarks for success. Maybe celebrate small victories with a treat or a pat on the back. Practice gratitude daily—list things you’re thankful for that aren’t tied to other people’s actions. This could be as simple as enjoying a sunny day or savoring a great cup of coffee.

Let me tell you a story. Imagine Sarah, an aspiring artist who always sought validation through social media. Each like, share, and comment was a dopamine hit. But inevitably, when the likes dwindled, so did her happiness. She realized she was outsourcing her joy to the whims of the internet. So, she decided to change. She began creating art for herself, finding joy in the process rather than the reception. She would paint something and then step back, feeling a sense of pride regardless of others’ opinions. Over time, she found herself happier and more fulfilled, simply because she took control of her own happiness.

So, the next time you find yourself waiting for someone else to make you happy, pause. Reflect on what you can do for yourself. After all, you wouldn’t hand over the keys of your car to just anyone—why do the same with your happiness? Take the wheel, and you might just find the ride a lot smoother.