"If you don't get what you want, you suffer; if you get what you don't want, you suffer; even when you get exactly what you want, you still suffer because you can't hold on to it forever"
Quote meaning
We all know the feeling, right? You desire something—maybe it's that dream job, a shiny new car, or even a loving relationship. But here's the twist: no matter what, there's always a catch. If you don't get it, you're bummed out. If you get something you didn't want, you're equally unhappy. And even if you snag exactly what you've been craving, guess what? You can't keep it forever, and that realization brings its own kind of suffering. It's a bit of a cosmic joke, isn't it?
This idea isn't new; it's rooted in Buddhist philosophy, and has been echoed by thinkers for centuries. The core message is about the inherent frustration in human desires and the impermanence of everything we achieve or possess. Siddhartha Gautama, the Buddha, taught that life is punctuated by suffering, often due to our attachments to transient things. We chase after goals, but even when we catch them, they slip through our fingers in the end.
Let’s zoom in on a real-world example. Imagine you’ve been working tirelessly for a promotion at work. You sacrifice weekends, put in late nights, and finally, you get it. You're elated! But soon, the extra responsibilities kick in, and workplace politics rear their ugly head. Stress levels climb. That initial joy fades, and you begin to wonder if it was worth the hassle. Or maybe you get laid off because the company hits a rough patch—suddenly, you're back where you started, if not worse.
So, how do you navigate life knowing this? First, it’s about perspective. Understand that desires and achievements aren't inherently bad, but pinning your happiness solely on them is a shaky bet. Cultivate a sense of internal contentment that doesn't depend on external circumstances. Mindfulness practices, like meditation, can help you stay grounded and appreciate the present moment.
Here's a piece of advice: next time you're chasing a goal, ask yourself why. Is it because society says you should want it? Or does it genuinely align with your values? And when you do achieve something, take a moment to pause and savor it, knowing it's fleeting. This way, you're not blindsided when the inevitable shift happens.
Picture this: you're at a coffee shop with a friend, venting about a recent breakup. You thought this relationship was "the one." Now, it feels like the rug's been pulled out from under you. Your friend listens and then says, "Remember when you got that job you really wanted? You were over the moon. But after a while, you got stressed and even considered quitting. It’s the same cycle, isn’t it?" You nod, realizing the pattern.
The takeaway? Life's a rollercoaster of ups and downs. You can't control the twists and turns, but you can decide how tightly you grip the safety bar. Sometimes, you just need to throw your hands up and enjoy the ride, knowing that both the highs and lows are temporary. So, next time you're yearning for something, remember—it's not the destination, but how you travel that counts.
This idea isn't new; it's rooted in Buddhist philosophy, and has been echoed by thinkers for centuries. The core message is about the inherent frustration in human desires and the impermanence of everything we achieve or possess. Siddhartha Gautama, the Buddha, taught that life is punctuated by suffering, often due to our attachments to transient things. We chase after goals, but even when we catch them, they slip through our fingers in the end.
Let’s zoom in on a real-world example. Imagine you’ve been working tirelessly for a promotion at work. You sacrifice weekends, put in late nights, and finally, you get it. You're elated! But soon, the extra responsibilities kick in, and workplace politics rear their ugly head. Stress levels climb. That initial joy fades, and you begin to wonder if it was worth the hassle. Or maybe you get laid off because the company hits a rough patch—suddenly, you're back where you started, if not worse.
So, how do you navigate life knowing this? First, it’s about perspective. Understand that desires and achievements aren't inherently bad, but pinning your happiness solely on them is a shaky bet. Cultivate a sense of internal contentment that doesn't depend on external circumstances. Mindfulness practices, like meditation, can help you stay grounded and appreciate the present moment.
Here's a piece of advice: next time you're chasing a goal, ask yourself why. Is it because society says you should want it? Or does it genuinely align with your values? And when you do achieve something, take a moment to pause and savor it, knowing it's fleeting. This way, you're not blindsided when the inevitable shift happens.
Picture this: you're at a coffee shop with a friend, venting about a recent breakup. You thought this relationship was "the one." Now, it feels like the rug's been pulled out from under you. Your friend listens and then says, "Remember when you got that job you really wanted? You were over the moon. But after a while, you got stressed and even considered quitting. It’s the same cycle, isn’t it?" You nod, realizing the pattern.
The takeaway? Life's a rollercoaster of ups and downs. You can't control the twists and turns, but you can decide how tightly you grip the safety bar. Sometimes, you just need to throw your hands up and enjoy the ride, knowing that both the highs and lows are temporary. So, next time you're yearning for something, remember—it's not the destination, but how you travel that counts.
Related tags
Acceptance Attachment Buddhism Contentment Desire Existentialism Human condition Impermanence Philosophy Suffering
MORE QUOTES BY Socrates
FEATURED QUOTES