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"Les gens ont du mal à se défaire de leur souffrance. Par peur de l'inconnu, ils préfèrent une souffrance qui leur est familière."

Thich Nhat Hanh
Thich Nhat Hanh
Translations
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Quote meaning
Let’s dive right in. The essence of this quote is that people often cling to their pain and difficulties because they’re afraid of what will happen if they let go. Even though their current situation might be tough, it’s familiar and that familiarity feels safer than the uncertainty of change.

Picture someone unhappy in their job. They complain every day, feel stressed, and it’s clear they’re suffering. But the thought of quitting and finding something new? Terrifying. What if the new job is worse? At least in their current situation, they know what to expect. It's like holding on to a prickly cactus because you’ve never touched a rose and you're not sure if roses have thorns too.

Historically, this idea can be traced back to ancient times. Think about the Israelites in the Old Testament. Even after being freed from slavery in Egypt, they often longed to go back. Despite the harsh conditions they faced as slaves, the uncertainty of wandering in the desert and the unknown challenges ahead made them nostalgic for what was once their “normal.”

A real-life example? Let’s talk about relationships. Imagine Sarah, who’s been in a toxic relationship for years. Every day, she faces emotional turmoil and feels undervalued. Her friends constantly tell her to leave, but she’s afraid. The thought of being alone, of not knowing if she’ll find someone else, paralyzes her. So, she stays. The pain she knows seems less daunting than the potential loneliness she fears.

So, how do you apply this wisdom to your own life? Start by recognizing your own familiar sufferings. Are there areas in your life where you’re sticking with the devil you know, rather than risking the unknown? Awareness is the first step. Then, take baby steps. You don’t have to overhaul your life overnight. If it’s a job you hate, maybe start by exploring other opportunities. Network a bit, update your resume. If it’s a relationship, perhaps seek counseling to gain clarity and support.

Now, let’s paint a scenario. Imagine you’re at a coffee shop with your best friend, talking about your job. You’ve been miserable for months, but the thought of searching for something new makes your stomach churn. Your friend listens and then shares a story. They were in the same boat last year — dreading every Monday, feeling stuck. One day, they decided to just look around, no pressure. They stumbled upon a job opening that seemed perfect, applied on a whim, and now they’re happier than ever. Sure, it wasn’t easy. There were moments of doubt, sleepless nights, but taking that first step was the hardest part. Once they did, everything else fell into place.

Change is scary. We get that. But sometimes, holding on to familiar suffering prevents us from finding happiness. It’s like staying in a burning building because we’re unsure if it’s raining outside. The unknown is daunting, but it’s also filled with possibilities. So, next time you find yourself clinging to pain just because it’s what you know, take a deep breath, and consider what might be waiting for you on the other side of change. You might be surprised at the world that opens up when you finally let go.
Related tags
Attachment Change and growth Comfort zone Emotional pain Familiarity Fear of the unknown Human behavior Letting go Suffering Transformation
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