"对所有人都要有礼貌 但与少数人亲密"

The essence of this saying is about treating everyone with kindness and respect while being selective about who you let into your close inner circle. It’s a way of balancing openness and trust — being friendly to all, but reserving deeper connections for a few trusted individuals.

This advice probably came about because people recognized that while it’s important to be generally kind and considerate, not everyone should be trusted with your deepest thoughts and feelings. It’s a way of protecting yourself emotionally, while still being a good person. Think about it: if you share everything with everyone, you might end up hurt or betrayed. But if you’re too closed off, you might miss out on meaningful relationships. This saying hits that sweet spot.

Let’s take a practical example: Imagine you’re at work. You greet everyone with a smile, you engage in small talk, maybe you even know a bit about your colleagues' lives outside of work. You’re friendly and approachable. But you don’t share your deepest fears or your plans for the future with just anyone. You save those conversations for a few close friends — the ones who’ve proven over time that they can be trusted.

How do you apply this? Start by being kind and respectful to everyone you meet. Smile, listen, remember people’s names. Show genuine interest in what they have to say. But when it comes to sharing personal details, take your time. Let relationships develop naturally. Trust is something that’s built over time, not given freely at the start.

Picture this: You’re at a new school or job. There’s a lot of new faces, and you’re trying to figure out where you fit in. You’re friendly to everyone — you make small talk in the break room, you join in on group lunches. But you don’t immediately dive into your life story or share your intimate thoughts. You wait. You observe. You see who is trustworthy, who seems to share your values. Over time, you open up to a select few. These become your confidants, your go-to people. They’re the ones you can rely on, and they can rely on you.

I remember when I started a new job a few years ago. I was eager to make friends and fit in, but I didn’t want to overwhelm anyone with my life story right off the bat. So, I kept things light and friendly at first. I joined in on team lunches, I participated in after-work activities. But I was careful about what I shared. Over time, I found a few colleagues who I really clicked with. We started hanging out more outside of work, and eventually, they became some of my closest friends. It was a gradual process, but it worked. I was able to be courteous and friendly to everyone, while still building deep, meaningful friendships with a few.

So remember, be kind and respectful to everyone you meet. But take your time with trust. Let your close relationships develop naturally. It’s a balance that will serve you well in all areas of life.