Get Started

"I'd hate to be an alcoholic, because alcoholics want to be able to drink as much as they want and not have it affect their life. I just don't see how you could drink while working at the post office"

Translations

MORE QUOTES BY George Carlin

“I don’t have pet peeves — I have major psychotic fucking hatreds.”

George Carlin

“The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American recently passed each other going in...”

“Scratch any cynic and you will find a disappointed idealist”

“People who say "life is short" have no idea how long ”

FEATURED QUOTES

“The greatest victory is that which requires no battle.”

“When the eagles are silent, the parrots begin to jabber.”

“Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.”

“The question isn’t who is going to let me, it’s who is going to stop me”

“You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream”

“The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem. Do you understand?”

“Those who dare to fail miserably can achieve greatly.”

“Confusion is a luxury which only the very, very young can possibly afford and you are not ...”

“Your beliefs become your thoughts, Your thoughts become your words, Your words become your...”

“I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart.”