"最常见的绝望形式是不做真实的自己。"

The heart of this quote tells us that the deepest kind of unhappiness comes from not embracing your true self. When you’re living a life that doesn't match who you really are, it creates a kind of inner turmoil. Think of it as being trapped in a role that feels wrong for you, like you’re wearing someone else’s clothes that just don’t fit.

Historically, this idea has been explored by existential philosophers like Søren Kierkegaard, who emphasized the importance of living authentically. He believed that many people fall into despair because they conform to societal expectations rather than following their own path. This quote echoes his philosophy, urging us to break free from those constraints.

Let’s dive into a real-life example to bring this idea to life. Imagine Sarah. Sarah's parents always dreamed she would become a doctor. So, she dutifully went to medical school and started working in a hospital. The thing is, Sarah's true passion was art. She loved painting and felt alive when she was creating something beautiful. But she suppressed that passion to meet her parents’ expectations. Every day at the hospital, she felt a growing emptiness inside her, like a piece of her soul was missing. Eventually, she realized that the life she was living wasn’t hers—it was the life her parents wanted for her. She was in a deep despair because she wasn’t being who she truly was.

So, what should you do to avoid falling into this trap? Start by taking a good look at your life. Ask yourself if what you're doing truly aligns with your interests and values. It might be a bit scary, but it's crucial to be honest with yourself. If you find that there's a gap between your true self and your current life, consider taking steps to close that gap. It doesn't mean you need to make drastic changes overnight, but start small. Maybe it’s pursuing a hobby you love or speaking up more about your thoughts and feelings. Little by little, these changes can lead to a more authentic life.

Here's a relatable scenario: think about your friend Tom. Tom has always been the life of the party, cracking jokes and being the center of attention. But recently, he’s been acting different—quieter, less enthusiastic. One night, over a couple of beers, he confides in you that he feels like he’s been wearing a mask. He’s been pretending to be someone he’s not just to fit in and be liked. It’s draining him. He’s not sure who he really is anymore because he’s spent so much time being who he thought others wanted him to be. This conversation is a wake-up call. Tom starts to pull back from his party persona and spends more time doing what he loves—writing poetry and hiking. He’s gradually shedding the mask and embracing his true self. He’s still figuring it out, but he’s feeling more genuine and less despairing every day.

This journey towards authenticity isn’t always easy, but it’s worth it. By gradually aligning your life with who you really are, you can escape the most common form of despair and find a deeper kind of happiness and fulfillment. So, take that leap—be brave and be you.